Those hadrons are hard to hide sometimes. You’ll be sitting at work, bored out of your mind, and next thing you know you’ve got a hadron in your pants. The worst part is you’ve got a meeting to go to you’re already late for…
Ok, I know the LHC deserves a little more respect than a couple of cheap knob gags, but this is a t-shirt website dammit, not a science journal!
Though it may be an uneasy truce between these timeless foes, we must end the bloodshed immediately. An alliance must be formed.
Though wooden peg leg and eyepatch manufacturers may be displeased by this alliance, it is for the greater good that we present the first official Pirate Ninja Alliance.
It was only a matter of time before game designers made our dreams of becoming rock gods come true… well, at least in the comfort of our own living rooms.
Guitar Hero came first, addicting an entire generation. Now we have Rock Band, bringing drums and vocals into the mix.
But for any of use not born in the 80s, the games can be frustrating. Not possessing the digital coordination that the Generation Whiners have, the games are all but unplayable.
Until along came Cowbell Hero. Every song ever written could use a little more cowbell.
This t-shirt appears to have been created in case you find yourself stranded at your local mall, surrounded by hundreds of brain sucking zombies.
It’s important that you have clear instructions on how to pwn zombie faces, and keep your brains inside your skull, right where they belong:
1. Choose Your Weapon – I suggest the sports supplies stores, although if you have a high-school level knowledge of chemistry, you may consider pharmacies or K-mart.
2. Aim For The Head – As everyone should know by now, zombies can be stopped by removing the head or destroying the brain.
3. Don’t Miss (or it will eat your brains) – If you do miss, you’ll find the zombie removes your head and destroys your brain… by eating it!
So don’t miss! Learn a swinging sport now: baseball, golf, cricket… even curling is better than nothing.
This Twitter themed t-shirt sums up everything I feel about the latest online social networking craze.
You don’t need a lot of letters to say, “fuck you!” In fact, you only need 7 of ‘em.
The “I don’t need 140 characters to say fuck you” t-shirt is ironic, since Sunshine Megatron himself tweets a tweet every time he takes a tinkle.
Still though, this shirt is pretty funny. For all of you annoyed with the recent Twitter craze, get this t-shirt.
As much as I love ninjas – in well, comparison to Pirates, that is – they can be real jerks sometimes.
If your family have been killed by ninjas, you’ve got a long, hard road ahead of you if you want some payback. Ninjas are masters of the dark arts, so if you want payback, you’re gonna have to work hard for it.
So if someone could chip in with a bit of cash for karate lessons, that’d be a real helping hand.
Click Here to get a Need Money For Karate Lessons – Ninjas Killed My Family T-shirt
Aww shit! Get your towels ready, it’s about to go down. Everybody in the place hit the fuckin’ deck, but stay on your motherfuckin’ toes. We runnin this, let’s go!
I’m on a Boat!
Awesome. Just, awesome! Did you know this song made it into the top 10 charts in New Zealand? Goes to show the depth of musical talent in that country I suppose…
I literally have the body of a God! Unfortunately, it’s Buddha…
I’m pretty sure that Buddha technically isn’t a god. And, in fact, I’m pretty sure God doesn’t actually have a body. So perhaps this t-shirt is a moot point. Whatever the case, it certainly appears to the lowest common denominator. I certainly got a chuckle out of it.
Now, to spoil everyone’s fun, the real Buddha almost certainly wasn’t a fatty.
Buddha means “one who has achieved a state of perfect enlightenment” and there are several people who have been given the title. The original Buddha, Siddhartha Gautama, lived from around 560BC to 480BC, but it was not until around 127 BC that statues actually depicting him became prevalent. Of course, by then, nobody knew what he really looked like. He was from a noble family, and althought he had been described as tall, slender, and of “manly build” (a lot like me, in fact) he may have grown in girth simply because that is what people expected “Nobles” to look like.
Well what do you know? You might actually learned something today. And from a comedy t-shirt website of all places…
I feel so dirty!
Click Here to get an I Have The Body Of A God T-shirt and worshipers will constantly be kissing your feet.
Get on board the latest Martial Arts craze to sweep the nation – Mixed Martial Arts and Crafts!
Think you’re a hard-ass? Then forget Muay Thai, quit Aikido, and give up on Brazilian Jiu Jitsu. These days, the master ninja strikes quickly, kicks your ass, knits you an ugly sweater, then fades away without a trace.
And don’t forget, you don’t get to start work on pottery until you are a black belt.
Trying explaining this one to your parents!
That’s not a bad batting average for abstinence, so I really don’t want to rub it in the evangelical’s and fundamentalist’s faces… but it does throw the whole unwanted pregnancy, abortion, Roe vs. Wade, condoms, pope, adoption thing out of whack slightly, when the one out of a billion conceptions from abstinence turns out to be the Messiah. That does tend to blow the remaining 0.01% out of proportion.