Apparently it’s funny to “heart” anything that is of an adult nature. Whether you heart beer, sluts, donkey punches or licking balls, a shirt advertising your sentiments is always hilarious.
Here’s a general one to get you started. It emcompasses all of these shirts in one classy, intellectual statement sure to impress your friends.
Show everyone how post-modern you are and (heart) heart statements.
Hella: adv., (hêlâ) The most frequently spoken word in the Northern California language, meaning: Extremely, really, very; (“Thank God LA is hella far away.”) Bay Area, CA.
This shirt is hella cool. Northern California is hella cool. That’s all I’ve got to say on the subject.
Ok, one more thing – hella is an adjective, not an adverb. Nice one Bay Area, California. I guess grammar isn’t that important with all that sunshine and .. homosexuality.
Che Guevara is probably the foremost symbol of anti-capitalist and anti-American sentiment in the entire world. His entire life he fought against Western capitalism, which he considered to be patently unfair and morally degrading. He believed deeply in the creation of the New Man, who would respond not to greed and power but to kindness and humanity.
Che only really became known posthumously. The romantic nature of his early and violent death, his iconic photogeneity, as well as tales of his legendary rigidity in his principals made him a prime target for American youths’ left-wing idealism.
Buoyed by charming exuberance but acting in clear ignorance of Che’s true ideals, the young would-be rebels quickly snapped all manner of Che merchandise, from posters to blankets to key-chains to t-shirts, all of it a clear representation of the cynicism of capitalist America. The very man who abhorred all material profit because a huge source of revenue for the world’s largest corporations, so much so that TIME magazine called Albert Korda’s 1960 photograph of Che the most purchased photograph in the world. In a paradigm shift of epic proportions, capitalist America turned one of its supreme enemies into one of its greatest allies.
So by buying this cliché, you are proudly further the cruel practical joke that Fate played on one of the most principled (you can call him anything you like but you can’t deny him that) human beings in history.
I didn’t know whether to laugh or cry.
In his speech yesterday, President Barack Obama lashed out about the excessive bonuses paid out to the CEOs and other execs of failing multi-nationals. He said the trouble at AIG was caused by recklessness and excessive greed. But here’s the problem. The AIG executives thought it was a compliment!
The Republicans are on board in this too. Iowa Senator Charles Grassley told AIG executives they should either quit or commit suicide. (He actually said this!) But I think that’s plain wrong. I mean, why give them the option of quitting?
I do like Grassley’s idea, but here’s my question: where was Congress when everything was falling apart, you know? They’re supposed to be looking out for us. So here’s a better idea. How about AIG and Congress making a giant suicide pact?
Update – In a stunning announcement, Citigroup showed a profit and had its best quarter since 2007. They made $8 billion in profit. That just goes to show you, you give a company $45 billion in government bailout money, and they’ll show you how to turn it into $8 billion. See, this is capitalism at its finest!
“When I hear that we’ll never overcome the racial divide in our politics, I think about that Republican woman who used to work for Strom Thurmond, who is now devoted to educating inner city-children and who went out into the streets of South Carolina and knocked on doors for this campaign. Don’t tell me we can’t change.
“Yes, we can. Yes, we can change. Yes, we can… *cough cough move to Canada *cough*.
“Where we are met with cynicism and doubt and fear and those who tell us that we can’t, we will respond with that timeless creed that sums up the spirit of the American people in three simple words – yes, we can *cough cough move to Canada *cough*.”
Is anyone else tearing up? What, just me?
Ignoring the theory, popularized by Dan Brown’s book The Da Vinci Code, that the apostle John on Jesus’ right was actually Mary Magdalene, the Last Supper was a bit of a sausage fest.
Looking at this painting, I can’t help but think that while Jesus was breaking bread, someone was “breaking wind”. Seriously! Look at the expressions on their faces, and the way the apostle John is leaning right over… it was probably him!
It wouldn’t have been Jesus. If that dude can change water into wine, I’m certain he could make his farts smell like frankincense. Which perhaps is where the saying “His shit doesn’t stink” came from.
Friedrich Engels’ book The Origin of the Family, Private Property, and the State (1845) addressed issues that many “Marxists” had not (they were more interested in workers’ oppression, not women’s oppression). It showed how changes in the material conditions of people affect the organization of their family relations. Engels argued that monogamous marriage is a social institution that has nothing to do with love and everything to do with private property. He wrote that if women are to be truly emancipated from men, they must be economically independent.
Contemporary Marxists Feminists, as I have seen it, don’t usually deal directly with reproductive or sexual concerns, i.e. contraception, sterilization, abortion, pornography, prostitution, sexual harassment, rape, and woman battering, like, say a radical feminist might. They seem to be more focused on things like the concerns of working women. They help us to understand how the institution of family is related to capitalism; how women’s domestic work is trivialized and not considered “real work”; and basically how women are given the most unfulfilling, boring, and/or low-paying jobs. These are all offered as partial explanations for gender oppression.
That reminds me of a joke: why did the woman cross the road? Who cares – the real question is, “What is she doing out of the kitchen?”
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